The Father's Heart

Lately I have been overwhelmed with God's abundant love. I feel Him with me everywhere. I know relationships should never be based on feeling, but sometimes it's what I need. I truly believe for the first time, I'm starting to truly discover the Father's heart. I don't know, it's not really what I'm going to talk about through the rest of this post, but I just thought I'd share. :)

I was talking to the wisest woman I know this morning (my mom) and was telling her about some pretty exciting things that have entered my life over the last few weeks. Recently I had been feeling a little guilty for getting "out of the swing of things" over the last year or so. Meaning I wasn't as involved in church or with my friends from campus ministry. I tend to seclude myself when something is either not right or change is occurring. Mom really challenged me not to be bitter about the last year. Bitterness is something that I struggle with from time to time and praise God that He is helping me break free of that. She made a really good point to me while I was sitting in my car talking to her, (yes I sit in my car and talk on the phone, whether I'm driving or not), she challenged me to look back on the last year and see how my heart had changed. I've been sitting here for quite a while listing out things about me that are different. I was surprised at how many things are different! I won't share all of them, but there are a few in particular that I will write about.

The biggest one is that a year ago, I thought I knew what I wanted in a spouse. Good gosh, looking back it's almost sickening with how shallow it was. It was based off pretty much looks, strength and career. Of course loving Jesus was on the list, but that was it. "Loving Jesus." There are many people that say they "love Jesus." God has taught me that there are greater things than that. I have gotten to the point (finally!!) where I'm just like, "God, take it." He really does know what He's doing. He has blown my mind these past few weeks with the little reminders of how He does have the perfect plan, and person, for me. I mean honestly, it's great if you're a gym rat and can tell me who won the super bowl 11 years ago, but in the long run who cares?! If I'm going to spend the rest of my life with somebody, the shallow things I wanted shouldn't even be close to the top of my list. Heck, I've pretty much eliminated them. So yes, that was a big one. God kindly showed me His heart during the little bit of struggle that I went through. He wants me to be cherished and challenged. I think a lot of girls feel unworthy of a man who values her heart and challenges her to fall more in love with Christ daily. I did for a while, but now I realize that God's desire is for us to be cherished and challenged in every way, because He cherishes us. :)

I was reminded of a really cool thing about God. He is my friend. :) "For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son." Romans 5:10 (NLT)
I'm starting to realize what it means to be God's friend. Yes, God has authority over our lives and we should obey Him but He is also our friend. He wants to hang out just like somebody would hang out with their best friend. So, recently I've had some pretty humorous conversations with God. It's neat to step out of the box that we have always put God in and see Him for who He really is.


I guess at the beginning when I said the Father's Heart really wasn't what I was going to talk about, I was lying. My bad. That's exactly what I just talked about. :) 




On a completely different note: I finally gave in and paid 50 bucks for a group fitness class at the gym. I'm one of those people that doesn't play around with money. Actually one of my worst faults is being too tight with money. You better believe that I am going to get every dime I possibly can out of this pass. I've had it for three days. Oh. My. Gosh. Just when I had confidence in "being in shape," I got pushed right back down! haha! :) It's been fun! I have learned a few things over the last 3 days of first experiences with group fitness:


1. It is possible to be so sore that you feel like your muscles are going to snap like rubber bands.
2. Step Aerobics is from the devil.
3. 8 minute abs is a walk in the park compared to the size 2 lady with the microphone up front.
4. Moving around vigorously for 50 minutes is a lot harder than it sounds.
5. I am out of shape.


Oh yes, one more thing. PACKERS WON THE SUPER BOWL!!! I called it since the playoffs started! It's all because 2 former Pirates are on the team. Ok, it not really, but I'm still extra proud! :) 
Maybe next year my Panthers will finally win it.... :D